The Plateau

I want to stop being obsessed.

There are times in your life when you are at your down and you let it lay flat for a extended period of time, and then suddenly after suffering from that long plateau of sickening unpleasentness you'd suddenly jump up. No, more like leap out of the current and breakfree. You begin to realise that, all you had to do was really to challenge your status quo.

This perhaps does not apply to every single one of us. But it definitely does so for me. Although this doesn't sound pretty much like it's something bad or something that you should not be hapy about, well there's always more than meets the eye.

When you first leap out of that earlier described plateau, you are somewhat boosted in the opposite direction at high speeds. In fact, you travel so fast in that one direction you think you are headed in the right direction. Although I've never taken drugs (and probably would never have), I think the sensation is somewhat similar. At that point when you first step out of that black hole and into oblivion, that amazing feeling overwhelms you. In fact, it hits you before you even know it, and sometimes without you even knowing it. WHAM! And you're struck by it.

Suddenly, you feel life will begin to pick up after this long insufferable plateau, just because you feel different now. For several days, you'd notice that lighthearted skip in your step, smell the roses and see rainbows.

But like drugs, this newfound feeling is always only momentary.

For the next moment, you'd crash land and find yourself back at that same plateau, or perhaps even lower into that dark bottomless valley.

When you wake up, back at where you were initially (or perhaps worse), you'd hate that sudden leap out that you had. That falsely induced beliefs about the other side. All those pretty pictures painted, the roses you thought you had smelt, the dancing butterlies fluttering around you, everything you thought you saw and experience when you were at the other side becomes the very thing you start to hate.

Because in actual, there just wasn't another side.

Your life belongs to that plateau, any leap out is only but a dream.

Because when you dream, you never want to head back to reality.