End of the road..

I guess its really time.
We've ran our course, and patience wears thin now.

Perhaps what was lost, can never be recovered.
And all these while, we have just been struggling to recover what was lost in the beginning.
There's just so many things I want to say, so many things I would love to sit down and explain.
But I've lost the motivation to do so.
After much thoughts.. I reckon when this motivation is lost, so is the drive to want to work things out anymore.

No more, do I want to pick up the phone and say the same things I've always been saying.
No more, do I want to type an email pouring my heartfelts.
No more, do I want to meet up and say the things that I could have said on the phone but chooses not to.

The words become stuck somewhere inside, and I am happy to keep it all within.

Sometimes, in our haste to make things right.. We make promises that we know could never be fulfilled.
I understand.
In our haste to kiss and make up, perhaps we overlook crucial issues that we should resolve, but chose to ignore.
It is in our haste that we cause things to be so wrong today.

In our haste.

But it is not in a haste that I am choosing this.
It is, and has been an ongoing battle.
And I think it is time to let it all rest.
Because the soul's all weary the eyes tired, the heart's dead.

My indecisiveness is, and will perhaps remain as my biggest downfall.
It is that, that kept us together all these while.
Not love.
I just couldn't decide.
Too afraid to do so.

I still am afraid.
But I'm choosing to walk the difficult path this time.
For I am just too plain tired to fight on, to wait till things become right once more.

It hurts me so.
When you said things would pick up, and it just didn't.
When you say you are sorry, and just didn't mean it
When you assure that you will know what to do henceforth, but never sustained.
When you apologise for your flaws, when you didn't believe you are.

At the end of the road.
A bittersweet aftertaste is all there is.
Sweet memories, the bitter feelings of involuntary deceit.

Because you were never meant to change.
You were never meant to apologise.
You were never meant to be flawed.
It was all just.. haste.

--
Lyrics from my favourite man.
Depicts everything inside now.


世界末日 Shi Jie Mo Ri
曲/詞: 周杰倫 Qu/Ci: Zhou Jie Lun Music/Lyrics: Jay Chou

想笑来伪装掉下的眼泪
点点头承认自己会怕黑
我只求 能借一点的时间来陪
你却连同情都不给
想哭 来试探自己麻痹了没 是
全世界 好象只有我疲惫
无所无所谓 反正难过就敷衍走一回
但愿绝望和无奈远走高飞

天灰灰 会不会
让我忘了你是谁
夜越黑 梦违背 难追难回味
我的世界 将被摧毁 也许事与愿违 (也许事与愿违)
累不累 睡不睡 单影无人相依偎
夜越黑 梦违背 有谁肯安慰
我的世界将被摧毁
也许颓废也是...

想哭 来试探自己麻痹了没
全世界 好象只有我疲惫
无所无所谓 反正难过就敷衍走一回
但愿绝望和无奈远走高飞

天灰灰 会不会
让我忘了你是谁
夜越黑 梦违背 难追难回味
我的世界将被摧毁 也许事与愿违
累不累 睡不睡 单影无人相依偎
夜越黑 梦违背 难追难回味
我的世界将被摧毁
也许颓废也是 ~ 另一种美