Where art thou

Over the past few months, I morphed into someone I hardly recognise.
When I sit down and look at myself.. and do some little comparisons, I hardly know who I am anymore.
I wonder if this is normal.
And that everybody change.
Or perhaps I have always been changing over the years. It is just that I have been giving it more serious thought lately.

On my first day at work.
My colleagues very kindly warned me about the crankiness that comes with the job.
The horrors that should accompany it.
How easily irritable you'd get. And how I should warn my boyfriend about it.

I laughed it off.
I believe, work is work, life is life.
You cannot blur those lines.
You cannot bring work home.
You cannot expect your personality to mould into what your job responsiblities require.
Instead, your personality should fit what is required of your job.

I am still unsure what to make of it.
And I am rethinking once more.
What I once thought, and what I actually think now.

A little self reflection revealed a whole lot.
I am somewhat ashamed of the person I have become.

So easily irritable.
So unhappy.
So pissed-off-with-the-world

Poor LBB.
How I abused him,
How I took it out on him.

I pinched, kicked, slapped, yelled, screamed, slammed down the phone.
I need to seriously reconnect with the sweet ol' me.
I cannot go on like this.
I cannot go shopping and enjoy shopping, when I curse and swear at people in my head.
And think how f*cking stupid they all are.

I need to rejuvenate, revitalise, reenergise, reconnect, recycle, reduce, reuse.. oops.

I am turning into a full-fledged auntie.
From jumping at free movie tickets, to gorging myself with free Japanese food.
Somebody stop me.

Caught a movie yesterday.
The price per tix was $9.50.
And it was Fantastic Four (lame lame)
But NO we didn't pay for tix.
Caught the movie free, with free popcorn, free coke.
Dad's family dad, he got a total of 6 tickets. But we only filled 5 seats.
Contemplated selling that one last ticket.
But who'd buy I ask you?

Sigh.

I need another life.