Thoughts running amok

Thoughts running amok

Its Saturday.
I am suffering a little of the Monday Blues.
I yearn to sleep and slack like I use to.
But I refuse to indulge in such a thought.
Because that only spells WEAK

Thoughts running amok.

Amok thought no.1
Perhaps it would be good to have a baby.
Look a Zoe Tay, look at Vivian Lai.
How their boobs swelllllll..

Amok thought no.2
Perhaps it would be good to start exercising.
All this inexercise is making me feel really really unhealthy.

Amok thought no.3
Perhaps he doesn't really love me the way it seems.
Or am I asking too much from love.
And I should come to terms with it.
That nobody would love me as much as he did.

Amok thought no.4
Perhaps we are happier apart.
No misunderstanding no unhappiness.
2 weeks in reservist.
Now that he is back, I am missing the missing-him period.
It seems nicer to miss someone than to have that someone you missed back in your arms.
Strange.

Amok thought no.5
Perhaps I am not as important.
How much does he know and remember.

Amok thought no. 6
My laziness is a burden.
There are tons of things outstanding for me to do.
But non completed.
That includes, watching Initial D, figuring out my Holga.

Amok thought no.7
I constipate.
But not now.
Since lunch yesterday, I have been heading to the loo after every meal
This is not normal.

Amok thought no. 8
I feel suddenly very detached from my surroundings.
Like really really detached.
The world seems to move really fast ahead at top speed.
But me, I am still rooted in the same position.

Amok thought no.9
I never should have picked up the papers to read.
I gave up reading the papers some time back.
Not that I am lazy.
I use to enjoy reading the papers.
All that interesting stuff.
Now, I don't even indulge in Life.
Lame as it sounds, but reading the news become really depressing.
Everyday, without fail, people die, murdered, new viruses, terrorism, poverty, endangered animals, enviromental issues, etc.
Its all problems.
How, or when did it happen?
All news became bad news.
Reading the news became that depressing and frightening.
After reading about terrorism, I would sit and wonder if we are going to be next.
If tomorrow I will wake up to the explosion in our very own NEL.
I hate to read of the complacency in Singapore's security.
I hate to read about the inhumane actions of the terrorists.
I hate to read about the casualties in this meaningless fight for freedom.
I hate to read.

Is that what the world have been all along?
Because I remember a time when I was young, and the world seemed more interesting and less meanacing.
What happened to that world?
Bring it back please.

And I truly truly wish people would stop harping about the NKF ex CEO.
Give it a rest please.
What is your issue with it?
So we all know he earn peanuts.
And apparently most people are not comfortable with the peanuts he earn, the gold tap he has.
Fine.
Would harping about this pay help the kidney patients?

I am not saying his obscene salary is justified.
It is obscene, he was arrogant.
But let us all not forget how in his care, he revolutionalise charity.
Without him, would you have thought of helping out for a charitable cause?
He and his team, began this ingenious idea of calling in to donate. Enlisting the help of celebrities to urge folks like you and me to donate for a good cause.
Without him and his lead.
Would NKF have that much money now to help as many patients as he did.
Perhaps it was wrong of him to profit so much from public funds.
But lets also not forget the number of patients that benefited from his help.
So they had to pay perhaps more than what could have been.
But still, NKF has more recognition now because of him.
Afterall, he made his sacrifice, he led a team, he brought in the money for NKF.
His salary and remuneration is questionable.
But please please, stop harping about it, and focus on the more serious issues.

Altough it is unavoidable that the public wants the organisation to be more transparent now.
But is it right to relook the way things have been done?
When it has been so successful?
I am not saying I enjoy all that Charity shows.
But seriously, thought about it. NKF did start it off, before all the rest jumped on the bandwagon and started their own charity show.
And seriously, other organisations joined in, because it is a good way to increase donations.
You think selling flags to collect donations is a better way.
Think again.
How much can $0.20/person in Orchard Road give you?

If it takes entertainment of sorts to increase public awareness.
I don't see what is so wrong.
Without the NKF charity shows, would you have known that kidney failure is this serious, is this painful?
Would you have been aware of the agony patients?

Think again, when you say NKF exploited the kindess and goodness of Singaporeans.
Because on the flip side, they increased your level of awareness.
And without it, would you have seriously donated regularly to NKF?

And please don't start telling me how NKF should not have asked for monetary help.
And instead try to recruit volunteers.
Medication, all the equipment is in monetary terms.
The more volunteers you have, does not mean the more lives you would save.

And really, how many "volunteers" we have out there are willing participants.

Now compare.
Government enforced voluntary service and
NKF Charity shows.

Which would reap more?
For me I would say the Charity show.

I am not a fan of mandatory voluntary service at all levels (that is, pri, secondary and even tertiary)
Because I truly believe, volunteering should not be made a compulsary thing.
You should volunteer because you truly want to and not because you have to.
What message are you sending across here?
You should volunteer because you really want to help, and not because it is a requirement for me.
There is a difference.
I experienced it first hand.

It is different.
I went to Yunnan with a group of volunteers.
And you could clearly see the difference between those who feel that they are there just to fufil a requirement, and those who are there and really want to make a difference for the community.
Trust me.
It is gross.
But its true.
I'd rather one admit that he/she is not interested in volunteering.

Anyhow, I have digressed.
But relaly, we should stop harping about the salary.
You cannot value the time he spent, the things he sacrificed for NKF.
Being compensated for his dedication and perhaps devotion is not wrong.
Who are we to judge if he was overly compensated.
Think of the family that he has but never has time for.
Think of all that he has to put in, the effort, his sacrifice.

If you think you are willing to take up the job for the peanuts he is paid.
Think again.
I did.
Given his obscene salary, I might not have taken it up.
The stress, the issues, the problems, the workload, the sacrifices.